RRU - Day Three - Cougar Sighting Info

What does it say about an institution that "Cougar Sighting" is part of their emergency procedure along with the usual what to do in case of fire, earthquake, and medical emergency instructions. In fact, it is not even an afterthought....it is listed between Active Threat (Lockdown) and Hazardous Materials.

In case you're interested, if you encounter a cougar here are the instructions:

- Pick up children

- Back away slowly

- Speaking calmly

• Give it an escape route

• Enlarge your image, eg wave sticks, open umbrella

• Report sightings or signs of a cougar food kills to security.

While succinct, here are my concerns with the instructions:

• What if you don't have small children? And is it ethical even to offer up your children to save yourself?
• I am an arm-waving loud-mouthed harpy. What if I don't have a calm setting.
• I trip walking forward. So going backward...so not going to happen.
• Why would a cougar need a an "escape route". I am a slow moving, gimpy, moist, plump object, no matter how large I make myself it's not going to be scared, it's going simply think "buffet"!
• And finally, if I'm dead...reporting the encounter seems redundant. Besides, where was everyone when I needed saving from the middle-aged woman looking for a good time.

:-)